Mommy

“What did I do?! I killed him!”

 

Depression  “Hey Anxiety”

“What do you want Depression? What did I do? I didn’t…I am sorr….”

“Hold on Anxiety! Look at this baby that has joined the world! Look at all the shootings and bombings! Remember everything we went through growing up?!”

Anxiety exclaims “OH NO! We have to stop the worlds evils from destroying this innocent child! What now? What can I do? What if this….what if that…. ”

Logic intervenes “Wait now everyone! Okay, yes, there are evils in this world and we cannot protect our child from everything. We must now just teach her how to deal with the ups and downs of life.”

*BANG* *BANG*

Anxiety “What did I do?! I killed him!”

Depression “Oh look. You killed logic.”


 

Having anxiety doesn’t mean I am not logical. I know that it is impossible to protect my daughter from all hurt in this world. But, that doesn’t stop anxiety from making my heart race, making me sweat, making me panic. It also doesn’t stop depression from dragging me back to bed all day long.

Oh boy, when Anxiety and Depression tag team logic… you get a mess of irrational fears and it makes it almost impossible to leave your house.

Don’t let Anxiety and Depression run your life everyday. There is help out there. I am getting help and I want everyone to know that it is okay to get help and you are not alone.

1 in 13 people suffers from some an anxiety disorder of some kind.

Just because I have this internal struggle everyday, doesn’t mean I am not a good mom. I  put all my strength and energy into keeping my daughter the happy and healthy little girl she is.

Remember all moms have a secret strength inside that can fight through just about anything. You just need to remember to

 

#staymomstrong

PERSONAL NOTE:

I started this blog with the understanding that I had postpartum depression and anxiety. However, I have recently discovered that it is not necessarily postpartum depression that I have. I have depression caused from a traumatic Event (post traumatic stress disorder). This lovely friend of mind decided to then bring his friend anxiety to the party! As I gain more knowledge about PTSD I will share with you everything I can. This was shocking to hear and I am scared for the next steps.

But, I know I have my husband by my side through thick and thin! Thank you honey! I love you. 🙂

 

Advertisements

1 thought on ““What did I do?! I killed him!””

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s